south arm of uganik bay
kodiak island, alaska
dear myles
i write to you as a last resort, all other methods having failed, all other avenues found to be blocked impenetrably and irrevocably.
i write to you as a supplicant, with open hands and hope-filled, desperate heart; i seek your intercession with a powerful enemy of mine.
i write to you knowing that if there is anyone in this brutal and lonely world of danger who can help me it is you, myles, ranconteur, man of fortune, and friend to the jellyfish people.
there's no need for pretend humility--your affection for the jellyfish is well-known. you've proven yourself time and again as an admirer and staunch advocate of those strange and not-so-elusive creatures, those quiescent invertebrates that most people would dismiss as mindless and sedentary blobs. while others jeered, you championed those spineless sacs of goo, and it is for this reason that i believe they will listen to you.
myles, gentle myles, i beseech you: by all things holy and unholy as well, please, reach out to your jellyfriends and ask them to stop getting caught in our net and pulverized by our hydraulic spool. it sucks a great deal; the pieces of them get into my eyes and make me cry, which always makes me feel like less of a man, even though i was raised in the bay area. they are a burning soup of pain, and i fear them, and i hate myself for being afraid.
please, myles, you have to understand--the situation is dire. the jelly legions march into our net in tremendous clouds, tirelessly and without end. happiness and sadness are one to them, for they possess only the most rudimentary elements of a nervous system and are entirely oblivious to the anguish they cause, oblivious even to their own mangled, gory deaths. in the face of such relentless assault, what can mere men do? your aid is needed. time grows short, our strength is fading.
dear myles of destruction, very distant cousin and help of all unwashed malcontents since you appeared to wilder in the basements of philly, the problem that torments me i place in your blessed hands. remember OH! blessed myles that rarely has it been known that anyone who sought your help was left unaided. with confidence, humble and repentant, full of love and hope, this favor i implore.
your most devoted petitioner,
Andy"
